1 04 2008

This morning I awoke to an epiphany. People really don’t care what I have to say. My opinions aren’t really worth much and this blog is really nothing but a set of rants from a madman, so I asked myself why I was so angry. It dawned on me, clearly it’s all a front and I’m warm and fluffy inside. The opinions I expressed were just a cry for help.

So I’ve come to realise that I really do believe that we are responsible for global warming, I believe that the rich should pay higher taxes to pay for the poor and nationalised healthcare is a great idea. Wars in foreign countries are wrong, especially without UN backing, and we should withdraw from Iraq immediately.

Terminal Five’s chaotic opening is an outrage and typical of why Britain should be terribly ashamed of ourselves (but not quite as ashamed as the Americans, of course). We should all really want to be Canadian. Parents are right to blame the government, fast food companies and video game makers for their children’s appalling upbringing.

Given all that I’ve decided I’m going to quit blogging. Naming my blog after a sexual indiscretion of a politician should have tipped me off. It disgusts me when politicians do things like that, Clinton, Spitzer, they should all be very ashamed. Why can’t they have sex with their wives? Or simply not have sex like every other married man out there?

As my last act on Textual Relations I wonder if you could help me with a quandary I find myself in. Given this epiphany I’ve come to realise that what I always thought were Republican leanings were my “beard”. I’m really a tree-hugging Democrat but I was too ashamed to come out of the closet, so to speak. Yet I don’t know who I should be pulling for, Hillary Clinton or Barrack Obama? They both have such great policies. Please help me make this important decision. I depend upon your wisdom to guide me.



12 responses

1 04 2008

*Waits for the time limit of the “epiphany” to expire*

2 04 2008
reasonable robinson

If you’ve only got two teams to choose between then you’re bound to come across some dissonance when previous behaviours don’t fit current reality.

Situations and people are dynamic and ever changing what might have suited life seen through the Republican lens a while back might not connect today.

What if….the parties are becoming redundant?? and simply don’t reflect how people are in this part of the 21st century? OK so you’ve cast a vote either /or…go with the party that fits the bill don’t just vote because of historical habit…

3 04 2008

So, my other friends April Fool’s blog was that he was moving to Africa…I think that wins. I always forget.

3 04 2008
Mr President

Bio: You know me too well…

RR: Hehe, you make some very good points but unfortunately this was all an April Fools prank. Whilst I do have Republican “leanings” I would actually describe myself as Libertarian, and don’t associate with any major political party entirely. I’m fairly open minded.

SomeGo: Heh, yeah, that one definitely wins. I was originally going to say I’d been diagnosed with lung cancer, which, given the fact I smoke, wouldn’t be entirely implausible, but I decided that might be cruel. And tempting fate. How would I have felt if I then WAS diagnosed?

3 04 2008
Advantage Liverpool. But Only Just. « Textual Relations

[…] Liverpool. But Only Just. 3 04 2008 Ok, so obviously Tuesday’s post was, for those who didn’t spot it, my April Fool’s post. I wonder, though, if referee […]

3 04 2008
Andy D

Of course you could ease into your new found liberal ideas…vote McCain. On many of the problems you listed, he agrees with you, Hillary, and Obama.

5 04 2008
Mr President

That’s patently untrue. The only policy I mentioned that you could legitimately call McCain very liberal on (and I myself am highly critical of him on this point) is global warming. This is heavily outweighed by the fact he doesn’t plan a withdrawal from Iraq, though.

5 04 2008
Grumpy Grouch « Textual Relations

[…] sleeping on it he decided this was remarkably harsh. After all, only this past Tuesday he did pretend he was giving up blogging forever. So he logs on this morning and decides to give […]

6 04 2008

In reply to your reply, I told my parents I was preggers…now I’m paranoid! It’s TERRIBLE…LOL

6 04 2008
Mr President

Haha. Aww, a little Somego running around might be kinda cute.

6 04 2008

No, no it wouldn’t.

7 04 2008
Mr President

Aw. I think a lot would disagree. Including your hubby.

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